Constellation
by jazzmonkey
Summary: Her therapy was to write a letter everyday, but, what about when she's got nothing left to say? When the war has finally ended, and her sister is avenged, can she finally put the pen down and move on? Song-Fic of "Address in the Stars" by Caitlin and Will.


**Constellation**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Detective Conan, and Address in the Stars is by Caitlin and Will.**

**I hope you guys like it. Recently, I've become super interested in dark, emo-ish music, and country. Weird mix, huh?**

**Well, on we go!**

**Bold** is thoughts

Ai stood there silently. She wasn't sure where this came from, but she had a sneaking suspicion that it came courtesy of their dear next door neighbor. She wasn't sure why Conan trusted him, but at the same time, his presence did not truly frighten her anymore.

He felt like her sister. The thoughts came back full round to settle on the reason of her confusion. Here, on her desk, was an album. Not just any. The album she had left behind when she ran from the Black Organization.

Sitting down, she swept away the papers of research and tried to ignore that her feet dangled off the edge of the seat. **The things that children must go through… **she thought absently.

She began to open the book, holding her breath. The first picture was of her and her older sister. Taking in a breath, she recalled the memory.

**_I stumbled across your picture today  
I could barely breath  
The moment stopped me cold,  
Grabbed me like a thief._**

Ai's cool breath lingered over the photo as it calmed back down. This was a picture of when they were still in the organization, but they had been celebrating her birthday. It was a wonderful time, even in the midst of growing up in a caged society. It was dangerous, but she knew that it had to be done. It was stupid, and in her genius mind, she knew about the risks she was knowingly taking, but she couldn't stop. Picking up the phone, she once again dialed the number that Gin and Vodka still hadn't disconnected for some reason.

**_I dialed your number, but you wouldn't be there  
I knew the whole time, but it's still not fair  
I just wanted to hear your voice,  
I just needed to hear your voice._**

After the voicemail played, the little girl switched it off. She bit her lip. She had so much to tell her sister. About everything that she had done, to all the things she had learned. About all the good she was doing, thanks to Shinichi giving her a second chance at life.

She wanted to tell her about Ayumi, Genta, and Mitsuhiko. Ai desperately wanted to tell Akemi about Dr. Agasa. He was like a grandfather, a lively grandfather that she never had.

**_What do I do with all I need to say  
So much I wanna tell you everyday  
Oh it breaks my heart,  
I cry these tears in the dark_**

Ai looked at the closed door. It was nighttime, and none of the kids were over tonight. Agasa was sleeping peacefully in his bed, so there was no chance of anyone disturbing her. She silently closed the album and placed it carefully in an empty drawer that she would later fill with the little trinkets that the Detective Boys demanded her to take.

Slipping a piece of paper from the printer, she picked up a pen and began to pour out her thoughts onto the sheet. It was not something anyone else would read. This was her secret. Not even Conan could find out about this.

She knew in her heart that it was a fruitless effort, but it surprisingly calmed her heart. It was a wonderful therapy that she would have scoffed at if anyone asked her about it.

**_I write these letters to you,  
But they get lost in the blue,  
'Cause there's no address in the stars._**

It had been a couple of weeks since she had written the first letter. Every week she got up in the middle of the night to write another that told a bit more of her story after Akemi had departed from her life. Ai was careful about it, but she was sure, that by Conan and Agasa's talks, they were suspecting something.

One night, she stayed behind at school to just look through her desk. The build-up in her heart had settled back down when she wrote. There were moments she wanted to just scream and let go, but all their hopeful and determined faces kept her here.

As she told Conan, she wasn't going to give up. He would protect her, she was sure of it now. None of them would come to harm, and neither would he. They were all safe.

**_Now I'm drivin'  
Through the pitch black dark  
I'm screaming at the sky  
Oh cause it hurts so bad _**

She remembers Subaru once telling her that death only takes time until it heals. The scars had to be there. The more scars she had, the better of a person she was. He spoke to her softly, as if he knew her.

Usually, she would have narrowed her eyes in obvious suspicion, but now, she had stood there, simply taking in his presence leaving her at the house before he entered the Kudo mansion.

**_Everybody tells me  
Oh all I need is time  
Then the mornin' rolls in  
And it hits me again  
And that ain't nothin' but a lie._**

Everyone walked away from her at some point, but now, she had hope. The letters continued and her disposition that she was utterly fine and collected stayed over her ached wounds. Akemi's deathday was coming up soon. Ai wasn't sure what she was going to do then.

**_What do I do with all I need to say  
So much I wanna tell you everday  
Oh it breaks my heart,  
I cry these tears in the dark_**

The cases continued, the letters filled up her desk space, and the Black Organization closed in. Her time of peace was up; it was time to move forward. She was going to end this part of her past on her terms along with him.

She told Conan-Shinichi-that she would help. She hid the kids away with Agasa. It was close, but after they both had the backup of Heiji and Osaka police, their own Tokyo force, and Kaito Kid and Nakamori, not to mention the FBI, they were ready.

The weeks afterward were nothing but fear, and in the end, Vermouth betrayed the leader and all was well. The place she had wanted to hide from had finally crumbled under her feet. It was all over. She could move on with life.

**_I write these letters to you,  
But they get lost in the blue,  
'Cause there's no address in the stars._**

Akemi's death had been the hardest blow for her, and the fact that her passing day was coming was almost maddening depressing after such a happy time regarding Gin. She had even seen the life drain out of him. Surprisingly, his last words hadn't been murderous or with killing intent.

He had looked at her almost sadly. She could have sworn his lips had moved in a silent thank you or sorry, but she pushed it out of her head after it was safely deposited on the latest sheet of fragile paper that was for her dead sister.

**_Without you here with me,  
I don't know what to do.  
I'd give anything  
Just to talk to you_**

She found out that Subaru was actually…her sister's lover. He had been watching over her as a favor to both Conan and Akemi. Akai Shuichi. The name rolled off her tongue so easily. Conan told her all about him, how he was FBI, and he was too late to save her. At first, she was bitter, but she understood his pain. He blamed himself as well.

She stopped writing the last letter to look up at the opened door. She saw all her friends walk in, and an exasperated Conan follow. He was nursing his broken arm and a head wound, but it was little to have the Black Organization dead.

Genta looked at the papers, "What are you doing?" he asked bluntly. "This is so complicated! There's too many numbers!"

Mitsuhiko looked at his friend, "It's clear that Haibara-san is…" he trailed off as he looked at the sheet.

Conan shifted the papers from Genta's hands, "You shouldn't look at what aren't yours Genta."

"Yeah, yeah."

Ayumi pulled herself to dangle with her arms from the desk, "Ai-chan? Whatcha doing? It's so dark in here, you need sun!" she chirped.

Ai moved the letter to rest under other papers. She smiled at the girl who had given her so much hope, "Okay, let's go."

She brushed past Conan. He looked at her questioningly. She shook her head and he closed the door behind them. Even as she walked out, she could feel all the pain slowly slip away.

For some reason, finally, she felt free. She felt safe. She felt…loved.

**_Oh it breaks my heart,  
Oh it breaks my heart,_**

The day finally rolled around. She stood there silently. Agasa had told the three that Ai had other things to do. They walked away disappointed, but understanding.

Conan and Akai stood there as well. Akai had been there, waiting for them, and they had passed an indignant Jodie on their way in. He nodded at them, reluctantly clutching a pair of crutches. He had tape wrapped around him underneath all the black clothes, that much she was sure of.

Conan walked up behind her. Ran had already visited the grave. She had become unknowingly attached to the woman that had worked for her boyfriend's 'killer'. He said some words quietly, but nudged Agasa out as they both left to wait by the car.

Akai looked at her, "How are you?" he questioned gruffly. In her eyes, he looked so strange with white crutches considering his affinity for black.

"I should ask you that. Honestly, I don't know what my sister saw in an idiot like you. Who does something as stupid as that?"

Oddly, he chuckled. She had never expected him to do that. From her sister's description, he wasn't much of a social kind of guy. "True." His small lesser scowl faded. "But, it was to avenge Akemi."

They stood there wordlessly. She could feel the letters pressed to her side. It was weeks of writing and memories in her jacket. Akai moved closer to the grave. He knelt down and gently placed down a single flower.

It was a lily. Her favorite flower because she said it wasn't the flower's fault for being chosen as the guardian of death.

Ai could hear him whisper a goodbye to her sister. He pushed up using his crutches and walked away. She was left alone at her grave.

**_All I can do _**

"Hi Akemi," the girl began. "It's been a while. I know I have visited you all that often. And not even you once in the past two years. I'm sorry about that." She gave a chuckle, "But, now, I can visit every week. Every day if you want."

She took a breath, "It's finally over. Gin and everyone is dead. Vermouth turned out to have been only in because they had her mother hostage. Her mother had died years ago, but she was in too deep. She helped us."

"I miss Akemi. But, still, I'm not ready to leave yet. I have friends here. Y-You would like them. They're very kind and fun to be around."

She stood there. She spoke softly about the battle, and about what would happen from there. Ai chuckled when she spoke of Akai. She wasn't sure if had been seconds or minutes, hours, even days when she stopped. She pulled out the envelopes, tenderly tied with ribbon.

**_Is write these letters to you,_**

"I still have to fix my last mistake. Conan's really looking forward to telling Ran. I'm almost done."

She waited before deciding, "I wrote everything for you in these letters. I thought you might be getting bored up there by yourself."

She lit the match and set the letters on fire. The elegant handwriting curled in the embers and she watched the white leave behind nothing. Taking a deep breath, "Tell Mom and Dad I miss them. I love them all."

"Goodbye, Akemi."

**_But there's no address in the stars._**

**Hey, it's Jazz :) Well, that's it! I hope it was alright. It just felt...right, when I wrote it for Ai and her sister. R&R my people!**


End file.
